Englisch Lernen mit Extrem Lustige Stories: The Collection

Von Zac Eaton

Lachend English Lernen! Englisch lernen kann extrem viel Spaß machen. Durch "Extrem lustige Stories" von Zac Eaton, lernen Sie Englisch und kommen dabei dem selbstironischen, schwarzen, britischen Humor näher als je zuvor. Durch das begleitende Hörbuch, lernen Sie dabei noch die perfekte Aussprache. Warnung: "Extrem lustige Stories" kann süchtig machen! Die fortlaufende Serie von Stories ist ein "must have" für jeden spaßliebenden Englischstudenten.

Some Reviews:

“You better sort your life out, Son”
Dad

“The lady at Subway called an ambulance because she thought I was having an epileptic fit. I just could not stop laughing!”
George Lamberty

“I fell off the toilet laughing.”
Chris Schretzenmayr

“Such an uplifting and light-hearted read, I nearly sh*t myself laughing.”
Harley Buck

This is the complete Set of the Series "Extremely Funny Stories" (7 Stories). Stories about a journey of laughter, self depreciating humour and some seriously deep shit.

• Sprache: Deutsch
• Herausgeber: Zac Eaton
• Erscheinungsdatum: 7. Juni 2014
• ISBN: 9781311565501

Buchvorschau

Englisch Lernen mit Extrem Lustige Stories

THE COLLECTION

Zac Eaton

Copyright 2014

Zac Eaton

Smashwords Edition

ISBN 9781311565501

[e-mail]

Andere Bücher von Zac Eaton

Englisch Lernen mit Extrem Lustige Stories

Extremely Funny Stories is a running Series:

1. A Day

2. Love, Romance and Being Horny

3. Invisible Touch

4. Island-Monkey

5. Welcome to My Life

6. British Cuisine

7. Broken Flowers

8. Zac Eaton - The Collection (7 Extremely Funny Stories)

English for Lovers

English for Lovers: 18+

Audiobuch

Im Anschluss des Buches finden Sie Informationen zum Audiobuch.

Über diese Serie

Lachend English Lernen! Englisch lernen kann extrem viel Spaß machen. Durch Extrem lustige Stories von Zac Eaton, lernen Sie Englisch und kommen dabei dem selbstironischen, schwarzen, britischen Humor näher als je zuvor. Durch das begleitende Hörbuch, lernen Sie dabei noch die perfekte Aussprache. Warnung: Extrem lustige Stories kann süchtig machen! Die fortlaufende Serie von Stories ist ein must have für jeden spaßliebenden Englischstudenten.

Some Reviews:

You better sort your life out, Son

Dad

The lady at Subway called an ambulance because she thought I was having an epileptic fit. I just could not stop laughing!

George Lamberty

I fell off the toilet laughing.

Chris Schretzenmayr

Such an uplifting and light-hearted read, I nearly shit myself laughing.

Harley Buck

This is the complete Set of  the Series Extremely Funny Stories (7 Stories).

Stories about a journey of laughter, self depreciating humour and some seriously deep shit.

Englisch Lernen mit Extrem Lustige Stories

THE COLLECTION

Copyright © 2014. All Rights Reserved.

ISBN 9781311565501

Warning: The unauthorised reproduction or distribution of this copyrighted work is illegal. No part of this book may be scanned, uploaded or distributed via internet or other means, electronic or print without the author's permission.

Die mit einem Stern* versehenen Begriffe werden direkt unter dem Textblock erklärt.

A Day

Suddenly*, the excitement* the beginning of the semester brings has come to an end and even though I still have at least a thousand things to do, I feel as bored* as a pacifists gun. It is Friday evening, I am 29, dying to be kissed and at the moment I think I feel the same way a condom feels when he is finally freed from his little package and then shamefully* used for a teenage party trick. That clearly was not its destiny*. Nevertheless*, things remain good. I am sitting here at my desk facing the open window and I can hear a dogs bark* faintly* in the distance while someone next door is shagging* a trumpet.

[suddenly = plötzlich, excitement = Spannung, bored = gelangweilt, pacifists = Pazifist, shamefully = schändlich, destiny = Schicksal, Nevertheless = Nichtsdestotrotz, bark = bellen, distance = Entfernung, shagging = bumsen]

As I reflect* on the day I have just decided* to bore* you shitless and tell you how it was. Why suffer* alone? Telling someone how your day was can, if you are me, be quite embarrassing*, even damaging*, if, not like me, you have a good reputation* to lose*. So, you will see what I mean as I describe* my day.

[reflect = reflektieren, decided = entschieden, bore = langweilen, suffer = leiden, telling = erzählen, embarrassing = peinlich, damaging = schädlich, reputation = Ruf, lose = verlieren, describe = beschreiben]

After swearing* at my alarm clock a second time while jumping* out of bed, I danced* the funky chicken. Then I put on some boxers and walked barefoot* straight to the kitchen* to make a cup of tea. Knowing our fridge* was empty* I still walked up to it with a sway* of intention*, opened it, poked my head in and stared* into empty space at a lonely* tin* of mushrooms, which I have probably known longer than my ex-girlfriend and from which, to my surprise*, mushrooms* are growing*. My facial expression* would tell you that I am thinking up a magical recipe* from this tin, but I am only analysing the smell. I took my fresh cup of tea back into my room, slammed* on the radio and did the Michael Jackson moonwalk to the bathroom where I shaved* a pretty face*. After realising* I am painfully late*, I dashed* out of the house leaving my untouched* steaming tea on my desk and jumped, in John Wayne style, onto my bike and we both sped of to uni.

[swearing = fluchen, jumping = springen, danced = tanzte, walked barefoot = spazierte barfuß, kitchen = Küche, fridge = Kühlschrank, empty = leer, sway = wanken, intention = Absicht, poked = stocherte, stared = starrte, lonely = einsam, tin = dose, surprise = Überraschung, mushrooms = Pilze, growing = wachsen, facial expression = Gesichtsausdruck, recipe = Rezept, slammed = knallte, shaved = rasierte, pretty face = hübsches Gesicht, realising = feststellen, late = spät, dashed = flitzen, untouched = unberührt, sped = sausen]

While passing the shop windows in Freiberg, it reminded me, as it always does, how happy I am not to bother* with that kind of stuff and I just enjoyed the fresh air, colour of the clouds* and the rain running* through my hair*. After chaining* my bike to someone else’s, I walked into whatever building* it was and then noticed* my flies* were open (I really do keep forgetting) and I quickly and VERY carefully tried to zip them up, but naturally* they got stuck* and the harder I pulled the more stuck they became. As usual, during this violent epileptic fit, the girl I have been trying to impress* for the last 6 months decides* to float past* that very moment and she probably once again* thought* to herself: What a disaster. Same shit - everyday.

[bother = beschäftigen, clouds = Wolken, running = laufen, hair = Haare, chaining = anketten, building = Gebäude, noticed = bemerkte, flies = Hosenschlitz, naturally = Natürlich, stuck = stecken, violent = gewalttätig, impress = beeindrucken, decides = entscheidet, float past = vorbeischweben,  once again = noch einmal, thought = dachte]

Normally, when we have an exam*, I take a big shiny* book with me and place it on my desk* just before the exam starts and everybody is nervously* waiting. So why should this one be any different*? You should have seen the uneasy*, curious* faces of my fellow students* staring its proportions while probably wondering* if that big beautiful book would have unlocked* the dark secrets of complex mathematical equations. Here is a conversation* I had with one of these fellow studies: What’s that? asks the guy behind me, leaning* forward, pointing* at the only thing in front of me*. Sorry? I replied, while turning around* knowing* exactly what was going to happen. What’s that? he repeats, again pointing at the book. What’s what? I echoed, only to scrape* a little more at his nerves*. That there! he points. Ahhh, the book. It’s an excellent book from Constance-Lee-Fridgit (spoken fast = constantly frigid*). Do you know her? I replied confidently*. No, he answered probably wondering if he should. You should. Great mind*. Good writer. Just the ticket! Good luck! I said with a degree of happiness and satisfaction only Alice in Wonderland with a ribbed vibrator would know of. While ignoring* his request to see it, I slowly turned away and opened my big beautiful "Kochen